Ever feel like no matter what you do, it's not enough?
I know so many of us get caught up in feeling like we can go to the ends of the world and we are still just shy of the perfect something.
I'm going to take a shot in the dark here but I believe we often don't even have a clear understanding of what that perfect something even is. Although we all convince ourselves we will just know it when we see it.
This can be a dangerous habit to fall into.
Especially when it comes to self-care.
How often to do you push aside going for a walk on your lunch break because it just doesn't feel like it would ever be enough to get you out of a productivity slump anyway? Or how often do you hold off on that massage because well, it's not like you have a cramped back or anything, so it won't truly heal you anyway?
Why does it take a blaringly obvious problem to commit to self-care?
My personal opinion on this matter is because we have a shitty definition of what self-care really is.
We think self-care should only happen when we get sick, or injured. Heck many times we don't even grieve a death in the family because there's just so much other work that is expected of us.
My definition of self-care:
Self-care is a way of life, not only reserved for special occasions. Self-care means integrating rituals, activities and behaviors into your life that contribute to your health, your soul, and your happiness. Self-care is what comforts you, revives you and heals you. Self-care can be anything that is beneficial to your life. Self-care is anything that enhances you.
And lack of self-care is why we turn to food for comfort. It's cheap, available, and instant.
True, sometimes there is no replacement for the comfort food provides. I believe that food can be the perfect source of self-care at different times of our lives.
But food can't be our sole source of self-care. This is when it turns into self-injury.
And honestly,food is not enough.
There will be certain times of our lives when shit is hitting the fan. Everything is in chaos. Or maybe work is super busy and you feel like you can't breathe or have a minute to spare. Your emotions are through the roof, you just went through a major break up, work transition, or lost something or someone dear to you. Maybe you are majorly depressed or working through an eating disorder.
There are so many intense situations out there we all may face throughout our lives.
And this is why a self-care routine or ritual is SO SO important.
Having a strong self-care routine enables you to feel more capable of handling the tough situations life throws at you. Life is difficult and self-care is here to balance.
And where we so often feel like what ever self care activity we may have done in the past is not enough, it is probably because it is NOT enough to counter whatever phase of your life you are in.
See, you need to match the intensity of self-care with the intensity of your current life.
Self-care needs will ebb and flow.
Maybe one day this look likes sleeping for 10 hours straight and taking a nap. Maybe this looks like taking a long 4 hour hike alone (or with friends). Maybe it looks like taking a 2 week long vacation instead of just the weekend. Or maybe it means taking more weekend vacations for the next few months.
Maybe it means canceling client appointments.
Maybe it looks like going to therapy.
Maybe it means on a daily basis that you need to get your workout in in the morning.
Maybe it looks like extra green juices.
Maybe it means hiring a coach to have an hour a week where it's all about you.
And maybe it even means having mac and cheese for lunch for the week because it reminds you of the lunches your mother used to make for you as a child.
There are so many options for self-care. And only you can know what feels like enough for you.
Okay, so maybe we can't take that month long trip to Bali, so going away for the weekend to a town 2 hours away seems lackluster, but maybe if you schedule several hour long visits at the spa, you may just get the comfort you're needing.This isn't about striving for perfection. It's about radically committing to self-care.
Start with your daily habits. Then move onto bigger stones that you can work towards.
Self-care for me on a daily basis helps me stay grounded and aware. Aware of what I need to do for myself when shit hits the fan so that I don't freak out and burn out.
For me, on a daily basis it means I:
- Work out, either outside or in my bootcamp class.
- Have a green smoothie.
- Take reading breaks throughout my work day.
- Wrapping myself up in my fuzziest blanket and drinking tea.
- Having plenty of alone time.
- Spend a few hours baking or cooking new recipes.
- Spending time with my boyfriend, seeing a movie or going out for dinner.
- Watching all my favorite TV shows for a few hours.
These are just a few examples of the new self-care practice I'm currently developing. I'm working on the longer range cares but I can tell you from implementing this for the past few weeks I've noticed less emotional burn outs and a more stable outlook on my current life. When shit hits the fan I am now able to identify where I may have been lacking in self-care that week.
This will also be one of the benefits for you when you commit to self-care!
I would LOOOOVEEEE to hear from you on this topic because I think it's sooooo important. So don't hesitate to hit reply and message me or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org