energy in motion

Happy Witch Wednesday!!!

I hope that you all had a beautiful and spooky Halloween, Samhain, Day of the Dead or anything else you celebrate at this time of year!

I wanted to write to you today because I definitely experienced some wicked intense energy the past few days that actually left me quite drained yet also anxious.

A lot of times everyone thinks that because I'm someone whom has studied self-development for many years and acquired many tools for handling and processing emotions that I am somehow exempt from experiencing them. This could not be farther from the truth actually.

I'm incredibly emotional with a hyper sensitive nervous system (at age 12 I literally was SO anxiety ridden I provoked the shingles virus in my body to activate and I still have scars from it).

So yes, I experience anxiety but my relationship to it has shifted over the years. I'm not exempt from the super uncomfortable feelings that are oh-so...human.

Sometimes the spiritual industry likes to gloss over and tell you to "think positively" and there's also this undertone that something is wrong and must be fixed or provided a solution if you don't feel "totally awesome" all the time or are experiencing some intensely shitty emotions.

This, in my humble as fuck opinion, is damn dangerous to preach.

The thing about being happy or any other "positive" energy, is that it too is a feeling, and feelings and emotions are meant to be fleeting. They are mean to ebb and flow and wax and wane the same exact way that the Moon does. Any emotion, ANY, is meant to move. It's temporary. It's transient.

That's why our moods change from day to day, even if nothing in out "outside" world has provoked that. I can literally have the same exact day as the day before but feel very differently.

This used to frustrate me "Why can't I feel like this all the time?" in regards to those more joyous feelings.

As time has gone on, as I've done some intense energy healing, and as I have began to work with the cycles of the Moon very intimately...I've begun to have a greater sense of compassion for these sensations and myself.

If there was ONE thing I could magically get everyone to make peace with it would be the seemingly inconsistent levels of emotions and feelings. It's something I still am working on myself, it sucks when you want to get shit done but actually feel like a whole bunch of "nopes"...there is not sugar coating the annoyance of that. But again, the compassion I have towards this process has lifted the blackness that is often hanging tight with that kind of experience.

Last week was very very very intense and active for me. I did a bunch of client work. A bunch of promotion. Interviews. Paperwork. Administrative work. Lovely bullshit trying to get health insurance for next year. Classwork. AND I was hosting a Halloween party in my home, something I've never done before. And going to Halloween parties, also not something my typical introverted home body self does.

Here's what happened after that: Sunday I spent in bed, Monday I returned some emails and cleaned, Tuesday I did mostly nothing work wise and then redecorated my office cause even though "work" stuff wasn't coming to me...SOMETHING wanted to move and be created.

And now today, I feel resorted of energy.. I feel open to receive and more capable to dive into work related happenings.

When you are highly sensitive and learning to work with your sensitivity, it's essential that you first work to give yourself FULL permission to respect your fucking energy. I had opportunities to get back to work and to continue the socialized energy of this time, but I had to decline and say "no" otherwise I would have set myself up to continue on the recovery. 

In the past, I would feel bad about needed so much time to myself and to simple..."be" but as I get more used to my own nature and understand my energy much more intimately the more I KNOW without a doubt what I most need. I work HARD and it may not be in the manner of which people are used to hearing about, witnessing or taking part of ....it's simply different.

At times it's difficult to resolve with "normal" systems but I've never felt more like "me" than I do today and that's simply NOT something I'm willing to get in the way of, especially right now.

So how did I handle my anxiety and move with this energy?

One, I'm hyper aware that the cosmic energy was fucking crazy pants...It was a New Moon in Scorpio (my Sun sign, this New Moon was transiting the end of my 1st house of self over some natal Planets such as intense Pluto), it was Halloween and Samhain...meaning a portal for otherworldly energy was walking with...at times I felt I was myself the walking dead so I knew that as an intuitive and highly sensitive..I would feel this...and then we also had the Day of the Dead as well...being in the U.S this energy is literally coming from all angles considering Halloween/Samhain are quite pagan and European and the Day of the Dead energy stems from the south of us. And we still have this MASSIVE energy awakened through Native American tribes standing at Standing Rock calling upon us to band together to save Earth.

Two, I reflected on my week. And I did not shortchange myself for how much I was doing. I reflected a lot. I celebrated my effort. I honored that my energy was used for these efforts.

Three, I took the action I intuitively knew I could manage and not feel set back in anyway. I returned the emails. I social mediaed a whole bunch and connected with my tribe. I set my New Moon intentions. I moved around my physical surroundings cause something in me was evolving and I desired to "see" it in some form. I rested. And rested. But then went for walks. I did energy work. I imagined the outcomes I desired in regards to a certain very material realm thing I've been dealing with but also did what I could to make sure I could be set up for success. I was vulnerable and honest with my feelings.

These are all important things. No matter what "THEY" tell you. Especially if you are reading this shit right now, you're probably sensitive. You are probably "awakening". You're probably into self-development. You're probably a witch. And the world needs that energy and awareness, literally more than ever. Really, this is what we have been prepping for.

So take damn good care of yourself and stop fucking around. Do the fucking work. Embody your cosmic magic.

That's the message I had for you today, but I also want to mention a few things before I go:

1) The New Moon in Scorpio Collective Astrology & Guided Pathworking Recording is ON SALE,
use the code "pcmoon" at check out and you get $2 off!! This 30 min recording is now only $6!


You still have more than enough time to tap fiercely into this energy and I've really been pushing this because this New Moon and combination of cosmic and societal energy really needs us to focus on our magic.

You can purchase this recording here.


2) Earlier last week, I was interviewed and spent over an hour chatting with my friend Erica Wiederlight, creator of We The Light LLC on her radio show,  about all things uber witchy, self-expression, divine feminine, bullshit fluffy self-help crap, and astrology. There were a lot of ah-ha moments and tons of cursing. You can listen to the recording right here (it's an hour of total passion speak for free!). She's also offering an hour long jam session with her for free to work on anything you need!

3) Thursday 11/3
 I will OPEN UP SPOTS for the FULL MOON IN TAURUS (happening Nov. 14th)
 PRIVATE MOON READINGS. Stay tuned on the newsletter and IG.

 We sold out last time in less than a half day! And once these spots are gone they are gone!

That is all for today loves!! I will be back here tomorrow with Moon reading Magic opportunities!


with magic,
Nikki

p.s here's a sneak into my redecorating, check out more on Instagram stories.
Follow me @MagicalSoulBitches!